person: OMG YOU DIDN'T STUDY FOR THE TEST???!?!?!
person: BUT HOW ARE YOU GONNA PASS???
me: i'm not
when you refuse to look at your bank account balances and pretend like everything is ok
you are not fat
you have fat
you also have fingernails
you are not fingernail
It’s the fckn worst when you accidentally close a tab
i hate it when a sentence doesn’t end the way i think it octopus
I just wanna have abs…olutely all the pasta and breadsticks
how can i be ready for future when i’m not even ready to get up in the morning
should i attend college or take the black
i hope my first child is a dragon
I’m on a new diet called don’t fucking look at me